


The Cupid Delivery Service

by archangelofletters



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Basically Dean and Cas trying to embarrass the hell out of each other, Fluff, Humour, M/M, Teacher!Dean, Valentine's Day, teacher!Castiel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-29
Updated: 2016-02-29
Packaged: 2018-05-24 00:56:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6135898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/archangelofletters/pseuds/archangelofletters
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel takes advantage of the school's Valentine's Week delivery service and sends his boyfriend a deliberately embarrassing card. Dean retaliates, and a war starts.</p>
<p>Written for the February round of the SPN Writing Challenge.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Cupid Delivery Service

Monday

It was the week before Valentine's Day, and Lawrence High School was already well into the festive spirit. Thanks to Vice-Principal Gabriel, every corridor in the building had been decorated over the weekend, with red and pink paper hearts hanging from the ceiling, garlands of fake roses strung up along the walls, and ribbons tied in large bows around the door-handles of every classroom. There were posters advertising Valentine's Day-themed bake sales, and some of the students had set up a charity stand called the Cupid Delivery Service near the cafeteria, where people could donate money in return for having cards, flowers, and anything else they brought in delivered to their classmates during final period. (This was a replacement for the sing-o-grams the school had previously done. Principal Michael had banned them last year after an anonymous prankster had sent him one every hour for a whole day.)

All in all, English teacher Dean Winchester thought it was ridiculously overdone and embarrassing.

Which was why, during his last class of the day, he was horrified when a student dressed as a cupid-postman hybrid enthusiastically presented him with an over-sized pink envelope.

His students giggled as he reluctantly opened it and pulled out an extremely flowery Valentine's card with 'To the love of my life' written on the front. Upon opening the card, a shower of pink glitter fell out onto his desk, making his students' laughter get about ten times louder.

'Son of a bitch…' Dean muttered under his breath. He didn't even need to read the incredibly sappy message inside the card to know who had sent it.

Well. Two could play at that game.

 

Tuesday

Castiel Novak was in the middle of explaining the attack on Pearl Harbour to his Freshman History class when he was interrupted by that day's Valentine's delivery. His class chatted excitedly as various cards and gifts were given out, and Castiel resigned himself to waiting patiently while the costumed students - undoubtedly Gabriel's idea - worked their way around the classroom.

'…and here's something for you, sir!' one of the students said brightly, handing him a large envelope and a heart-shaped balloon.

Castiel stared at both items, while his class laughed and wolf-whistled, and someone at the back of the room shouted for him to open the card and tell them all what it said.

Like Hell he was going to do that.

The card turned out to be one of those pop-up ones that also played an irritating tune every time it was opened, and for the rest of the class, his students kept managing to find excuses to go up to his desk and 'accidentally' set the damn thing off again. The balloon wasn't much better, as it kept bobbing up and down behind his chair, getting in his way whenever he tried to move.

When the bell finally rang for the end of the day and his class filed out into the corridor, Castiel looked at the balloon and smirked.

If that was the way things were going, bring it on.

 

Wednesday

'Special delivery!'

Dean sighed at those words, knowing that there was very little point in trying to carry on teaching now. His Sophomore class actually _cheered_ as the delivery students pranced into the room, and Dean raised his eyebrows at the huge bouquet of roses one of them was holding. He pitied the poor bastard who had to have those on their desk for the rest of the day, but at least there was nothing for -

'Oh, you've got to be kidding me,' he groaned, watching with growing dread as the student carrying the roses approached his desk.

'For you, sir!' the girl announced. 'There's a note with them too, and I was told to read it out loud. It says, _Happy Valentine's Week, sweetheart. May these roses bloom like the love I have for you in my heart. From You-Know-Who_. And there's a card as well.'

She handed him another pink envelope, flashed him a wide grin, then practically skipped out of the classroom with the other two delivery students.

'Who are they from, sir?' someone asked.

Dean rolled his eyes. 'Voldemort,' he said flatly, causing another wave of laughter to go around his class. He couldn't wait for the end of the day now.

This was war.

 

Thursday

All through his final class of the day, Castiel watched the clock on his classroom wall. Deep down he knew the delivery students would show up again at some point, but for every minute that went by without any sign of them, he allowed himself to feel a fraction more hopeful that they might have forgotten to visit his classroom.

When there were just ten minutes to go, he actually began to feel relieved - but, of course, that turned out to be the precise moment that the classroom door opened and the students paraded in.

Whatever relief he had been feeling quickly turned to complete and utter embarrassment when he saw the giant teddy one of the boys was carrying. His class had apparently worked out immediately who the stuffed monstrosity was for, and the giggles and wolf-whistles started up long before the student reached the front of the class.

'Happy Valentine's Week, sir!' he said chirpily, sitting the teddy on Castiel's desk and giving him a bright red envelope too.

'Thank you,' Castiel replied, resisting the urge to bang his head against the wall. His students were making 'aww' noises now, and he could feel his face rapidly becoming the same colour as the envelope in his hand.

He opened the card at his class's insistent urging, but one glance at the message made him choke on air and hurriedly shove it in his desk drawer before the kids in the front row could see the frankly filthy things that were written - and drawn - inside.

Things had started to get out of hand. And there was only one way to deal with that.

 

Friday

'Sir?'

Dean braced himself before looking up from the textbook. One of the delivery girls was hovering in front of his desk, rather obviously trying not to laugh, and there were giggles rippling through the rest of his class.

'Yes?' he asked resignedly.

The girl bit her lip to stifle her grin. 'Um - we've got some things for you,' she said. 'Quite a lot of things, actually. Um… where would you like us to put them?'

She moved slightly to the side and Dean's eyes almost popped out of his head when he saw the _line_ of students behind her, each carrying something pink, red, and/or glittery. Vice-Principal Gabriel himself was hovering in the classroom doorway, observing the scene with unabashed delight, and Dean could see several other people - students and staff - stopping to watch in the corridor outside.

Dean gritted his teeth and tried to smile sweetly at the girl. 'Just put them in the corner over there,' he said, pointing. 'And when you're done…' He quickly scribbled something down on a scrap piece of paper. 'Give this to Hannah in reception, will you? Here, let me give you a donation…'

He fished a couple dollars out of his wallet and handed them to the poor girl along with the note, then grimaced at the sight of the small mountain of gifts he now had. There were three cards, a bouquet of flowers, two small pink teddies, a truly enormous box of chocolates, and three sparkly balloons.

Gabriel started applauding from the doorway, and it was times like this that Dean wished looks really could kill.

Once the delivery students had - finally - left and the class had settled back down as much as they were ever going to, Dean sneakily took out his phone and sent a quick text under the desk.

_You deserve this, asshole. ;)_

\---------

Castiel felt his phone buzz in his pocket, and when his students weren't looking he quickly snuck a look at it. The text puzzled him somewhat: nothing had happened today - at least, not in his classes. The Cupid Delivery Service had been and gone, and there hadn't been anything for Castiel this time. He'd been incredibly relieved - but now the text had gotten him worried again. What was going on?

The intercom speakers suddenly crackled into life, as they often did on a Friday afternoon, and Hannah's voice began to make the end-of-week announcements. The bake sale had made a decent amount of money for a local charity, tickets for next month's football match would be available next Monday…

'…and finally, one last thing, just to set the mood for the weekend,' Hannah said. 'This is a special request from an anonymous person to Mr Castiel Novak in the History Department. Happy Valentine's Week!'

And then the opening bars of Celine Dion's 'My Heart Will Go On' started playing over the speakers.

Castiel closed his eyes and lightly hit his head on his desk. His class had started laughing, and when the song reached the first chorus, the classroom door burst open and Gabriel rushed in to begin a very over-the-top lip-sync performance.

Castiel took his phone from his pocket again and typed out a reply to the text he'd received earlier.

_I hate you. xxx_

\---------

When the day was over and the students had all gone home, Dean and Castiel met in the parking lot by Dean's car. Castiel couldn't help laughing at how ridiculous his boyfriend looked, carrying all the gifts he'd received that afternoon, but he quickly shut up when Dean dumped half of them in his arms and made him help get the lot into the Impala's trunk.

On the drive back to their shared apartment, Dean glanced across at Castiel and grinned.

'I should really make you sleep on the couch tonight after you sent me all that crap,' he said lightly.

Castiel snorted. 'Excuse me. It's your fault half our bedroom is taken up by that damn teddy bear from yesterday.'

Dean laughed, then started humming 'My Heart Will Go On' until Castiel smacked his leg.

'Don't you dare,' he growled. 'My class will be singing that at me for weeks now.'

'I know,' Dean said smugly. 'Consider it payback for getting my desk covered in glitter on Monday.'

Castiel shot him a grin, and then said, 'I reckon I won, though. With that conga-line of gifts.'

'You did not,' Dean replied. 'I deserve extra points for the song, since it was unplanned.'

'But I get more points for having a student read out the sappy note that came with the flowers,' Castiel pointed out.

Dean made a face. 'I get points for the drawing I put in Thursday's card.'

Castiel looked at Dean for a while, his eyes narrowed, and Dean smirked. There was a pause, and then Castiel said:

'We are so fucking this out tonight.'


End file.
